Mind

Source: 9 Mind-Bending Epiphanies That Turned My World Upside-Down

This text is reposted from article 9 Mind-Bending Epiphanies That Turned My World Upside-Down by David, Raptitude

You can read the original here

1. You are not your mind.

The first time I heard somebody say that,  I didn’t like the sound of it one bit. What else could I be? I had taken for granted that the mental chatter in my head was the central “me” that all the experiences in my life were happening to.

I see quite clearly now that life is nothing but passing experiences, and my thoughts are just one more category of things I experience. Thoughts are no more fundamental than smells, sights and sounds. Like any experience, they arise in my awareness, they have a certain texture, and then they give way to something else.

If you can observe your thoughts just like you can observe other objects, who’s doing the observing? Don’t answer too quickly. This question, and its unspeakable answer, are at the center of all the great religions and spiritual traditions.

2. Life unfolds only in moments.

Of course! I once called this the most important thing I ever learned. Nobody has ever experienced anything that wasn’t part of a single moment unfolding. That means life’s only challenge is dealing with the single moment you are having right now. Before I recognized this, I was constantly trying to solve my entire life — battling problems that weren’t actually happening. Anyone can summon the resolve to deal with a single, present moment, as long as they are truly aware that it’s their only point of contact with life, and therefore there is nothing else one can do that can possibly be useful. Nobody can deal with the past or future, because, both only exist as thoughts, in the present. But we can kill ourselves trying.

3. Quality of life is determined by how you deal with your moments, not which moments happen and which don’t.

I now consider this truth to be Happiness 101, but it’s amazing how tempting it still is to grasp at control of every circumstance to try to make sure I get exactly what I want. To encounter an undesirable situation and work with it willingly is the mark of a wise and happy person. Imagine getting a flat tire, falling ill at a bad time, or knocking something over and breaking it — and suffering nothing from it. There is nothing to fear if you agree with yourself to deal willingly with adversity whenever it does show up. That is how to make life better. The typical, low-leverage method is to hope that you eventually accumulate power over your circumstances so that you can get what you want more often. There’s an excellent line in a Modest Mouse song, celebrating this side-effect of wisdom:  As life gets longer, awful feels softer.

4. Most of life is imaginary.

Human beings have a habit of compulsive thinking that is so pervasive that we lose sight of the fact that we are nearly always thinking. Most of what we interact with is not the world itself, but our beliefs about it, our expectations of it, and our personal interests in it. We have a very difficult time observing something without confusing it with the thoughts we have about it, and so the bulk of what we experience in life is imaginary things. As Mark Twain said: “I’ve been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” The best treatment I’ve found? Cultivating mindfulness.

5. Human beings have evolved to suffer, and we are better at suffering than anything else.

Yikes. It doesn’t sound like a very liberating discovery. I used to believe that if I was suffering it meant that there was something wrong with me — that I was doing life “wrong.” Suffering is completely human and completely normal, and there is a very good reason for its existence. Life’s persistent background hum of “this isn’t quite okay, I need to improve this,” coupled with occasional intense flashes of horror and adrenaline are what kept human beings alive for millions of years. This urge to change or escape the present moment drives nearly all of our behavior. It’s a simple and ruthless survival mechanism which works exceedingly well for keeping us alive, but it has a horrific side effect: human beings suffer greatly by their very nature. This, for me, redefined every one of life’s problems as some tendril of the human condition. As grim as it sounds, this insight is liberating because it means: 1) that suffering does not necessarily mean my life is going wrong, 2) that the ball is always in my court, so the degree to which I suffer is ultimately up to me, and 3) that all problems have the same cause and the same solution.

6. Emotions exist to make us biased.

This discovery was a complete 180 from my old understanding of emotions. I used to think my emotions were reliable indicators of the state of my life — of whether I’m on the right track or not. Your passing emotional states can’t be trusted for measuring your self-worth or your position in life, but they are great at teaching you what it is you can’t let go of. The trouble is that emotions make us both more biased and more forceful at the same time. Another survival mechanism with nasty side-effects.

7. All people operate from the same two motivations: to fulfill their desires and to escape their suffering.

Learning this allowed me to finally make sense of how people can hurt each other so badly. The best explanation I had before this was that some people are just bad. What a cop-out. No matter what kind of behavior other people exhibit, they are acting in the most effective way they are capable of (at that moment) to fulfill a desire or to relieve their suffering. These are motives we can all understand; we only vary in method, and the methods each of us has at our disposal depend on our upbringing and our experiences in life, as well as our state of consciousness. Some methods are skillful and helpful to others, others are unskillful and destructive, and almost all destructive behavior is unconscious. So there is no good and evil, only smart and dumb (or wise and foolish.) Understanding this completely shook my long-held notions of morality and justice.

8. Beliefs are nothing to be proud of.

Believing something is not an accomplishment. I grew up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they’re really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because “strength of belief” is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you’ve made it a part of your ego. Listen to any “die-hard” conservative or liberal talk about their deepest beliefs and you are listening to somebody who will never hear what you say on any matter that matters to them — unless you believe the same. It is gratifying to speak forcefully, it is gratifying to be agreed with, and this high is what the die-hards are chasing. Wherever there is a belief, there is a closed door. Take on the beliefs that stand up to your most honest, humble scrutiny, and never be afraid to lose them.

9. Objectivity is subjective.

Life is a subjective experience and that cannot be escaped. Every experience I have comes through my own, personal, unsharable viewpoint. There can be no peer reviews of my direct experience, no real corroboration. This has some major implications for how I live my life. The most immediate one is that I realize I must trust my own personal experience, because nobody else has this angle, and I only have this angle. Another is that I feel more wonder for the world around me, knowing that any “objective” understanding I claim to have of the world is built entirely from scratch, by me. What I do build depends on the books I’ve read, the people I’ve met, and the experiences I’ve had. It means I will never see the world quite like anyone else, which means I will never live in quite the same world as anyone else — and therefore I mustn’t let outside observers be the authority on who I am or what life is really like for me. Subjectivity is primary experience — it is real life, and objectivity is something each of us builds on top of it in our minds, privately, in order to explain it all. This truth has world-shattering implications for the roles of religion and science in the lives of those who grasp it.

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Alfred Adler 1879 – 1937

A central idea in Adlerian psychology is that individuals are always striving toward a goal, whether it is conscious or not.

We live our life by our “fictions” about the sort of person we are and the person we are becoming.

It is this very fact of goal directedness that makes the psyche almost indestructible and so resistant to change.

“Character” is the unique interplay between two opposing forces, a need for power and a need of “social feeling” and togetherness.

Books:

  • The Neurotic Constitution
  • The Science of Living
  • The Practice and Theory of Individual Psychology
  • What Life Could Mean to You

Archives

18 December 2005

God
… God does not exist, it is only a representation or an escape … In a World where there is no God, man accepts the responsibility of God. In a world in which there is no God man is lonely and confused, frightened by what you do not understand, limited by his ignorance. So where is the fear of God, is there anything wrong with looking for comfort and safety. That hypocrisy. Hypocrisy. Weakness. Or fulfillment? Maybe peace, security, safety, but is really fulfillment? Faith, hope, love. There is nothing more than life, which is all or nothing. Die, lose a life, then nothing. If there is no life after death there is nothing worse than what we experience here. Death is a great calm.

Life is so valuable so far as we hope. Here and Now. It seems to me that most people live in what will be, what could be, what can happen. The fear that this could be true. The strength comes from faith and dreams. This what we would like to be, what we would have, gives strength. Maybe, I just wish there were people who draw strength from the days of today:

“Cherub Song”

In the morning we leave the house,

the enemies of miracles,

each one on his own path…

and only in the evening

lies before us fruit of our effort

like a violin – just finished.

Wife puts a flower on the window,

tree buzzes in the chimney,

on gold plated hands

drifts music.

The strenght derived from fire

masculines stubborn backs.

As commander to acquire the fortress

we march every day.

And sometimes gets us the blade,

hitting from right and left,

so there can be simple things:

meat, bread, tree.

Konstanty Ildefons Gałczyński 1930
(22:00)

The Art of Happiness – a thing of mind

I just thought today that I neglected the “mind” part of mu blog. I have been devoted to search for happiness and self development in my life. I always miss details so I’m not a perfecionist but somebody made me see my search as aiming for perfection. I don’t know if this is so.

I only recently came to understanding that I do not need to be perfect, that I have to accept that even though I try hard to be good it’s not always possible. I make my mistakes, I hurt others.

Today my outlook has shifted again but it’s too fresh to go on about it, as I don’t think I’m there yet.

Anyway i decided to commit to writing about my search for happiness. Ideas, methods, books, anything that I remember that contributes to my view on how to live really. I’m not saying “Follow me” I simply hope I can inspire some of you to feel better.

We’ll see how it works out.

When I think about what I want to contribute to the World, i always felt I wanted to make change on a personal level, help those close to me find their way to be happy. I’m asking myslef probably the same question as you do. What the f… do I know about what will make you happy?! Well not much, but the thing is I don’t feel I need to know, you have to know.

The Art of Happiness is a book by the Dalai Lama and Howard Cutler. I lended it to my friend so I won’t write about it today. I think I will start tomorrow with something different that I came across years ago.

Hope to see you then.

On love

November 17, 2005

In rare moments of sanity, when yearning and uncertainty are not tearing me apart, I’m aware of certain thoughts that knock in my head;

For everything there is an appropriate time and place. And so there is room for the one love. If you want it to be a full and permanent you need to be ready for it. How many chances wasted by his immaturity, shakiness, uncertainty.

Great love must fall to the ground, which is stable and mature so that it can grow into a great, magnificent tree that is able to take roots.

In moments of sanity I feel I’m not ready and I wonder if somehow this development can be accelerated. I think it is, however, as with a dough. If you want to bake it too quickly, you will burn it or it will be half-baked…

 

… so much about love

On feminity

November 27, 2005
Monica BelucciToday is my birthday …
I celebrated it yesterday and today at 8 am when the alarm clock rang I was still drunk. I’m sad. What do I write blog for asked me my friend Z. yesterday. Just to be able to write “I’m sad” and get the feeling that I’m not talking only to myself. A long time since I was sad. Depressed, angry, but not so simply helplessly sad. Why helplessly? Because I can not find a direct cause, and thus somehow control this feelings. I’m sad. What is femininity? I asked myself this question today, how to learn it and how to become unique? Is unique congenital or can it be learned? Is it then artificial and or can self-creation be natural … I typed the word femininity to google, ignored all treatment groups, male and femininity in bookstores. Here’s what I found: “Femininity is something more than our exterior, is a special kind of sensitivity, feeling, thinking, and communicating with śthe World. Our busy, patched, set aside for” later ” femininity is in every one of us and waiting for discovery, the attention, care and love.Monica Belucci It flourishes in the dance, so we’ll dance to discover our beauty, to please yourself, love yourself, discover and imbibe feminity. We will dance the various aspects of femininity, wake up our center, will play in the dance, we will become light and delicate, lyrical and romantic, but also seductive, proud, wild and free. We will try to transform from a small dancing girl into woman conscious of her charm. And most importantly, we will mark “ephemeral traces of our feet in the sand”.

Valentine’s Day for singles – how not to be Bridget

Here we go again. Another year and once again dreadful perspective for some – being alone on Valentine’s Day.

When whole of our known and close World is celebrating the feast of romantic love what are we singles supposed to do? Tulip valentine's day

Here are some thoughts and ideas on the subject.

  1. Refuse to acknowledge it’s existance – well good luck with that…
  2. Get on the dark “anty commercial” side and say “I refuse to celebrate a holiday which was invented to earn money”
  3. Be opportunistic and say “I won’t celebrate when they tell me to, romance should be present in a relationship everyday” hahahaa it always makes me want to ask a person “When did you acctually do something romantic?”
  4. Celebrate it! Now, this could be one point but I won’t stop there
  5. Ways to spend Valentine’s Day are numerous and well known so my first idea for singletons is to embrace decadent pleasures:
  • chocolate
  • alkohol
  • doing-nothing
  • crying on sentimental movies
  • long candel light bath with a romance book
  • porto in front of a fire place with Stacy Kent singing in the background
  • meeting up with your single friend and doing all of the above (pampering maybe instead of the bath)
  • spoiling yourself with a nice gift, something impractical but beautiful
  • going to latino music Valentine’s Day party for singles and becoming a queen of the dance floor
  • have a fling
  • if you love travel like I do buy a discount ticket and go to the sea in the afternoon and come back on the night train, see who you meet there
  • run around naked in the snow – this one is inspired by skandynavia ;)
  • stand on the walkway and pretend you take part in the “Hug the World” iniciative
  • go to an Irish pub, order a Guiness and talk to the barman or locals
  • batter plates (I never have done that before) – this one is for the angry ones
  • oh right my friend is going to watch soccer match
  • play strip poker with strangers (and I don’t mean on the computer)

The truth is what I really wanted to write is about how you can feel miserable about being single on this day or you can choose to make it fun. Yes maybe today you really are single (my boyfriends always broke up with me before Valentine’s Day or I was in a long distance relationship or they refused to celebrate it) but then you can make your own Valentine’s Day some other time, maybe when it’s warm and whole lot of other romantic possibilities open up.

The date itself is not that important, what is important is that a lot of people don’t understand you need to put meaning into celebration of holidays. Let it be Valentine’s Day or Christmas. You can consider buying a ready made Valentine Card, flowers and paying for dinner a part of big industry, with no meaning at all and consider it little effort. But it really can be beautiful and meaningful when your gaze over candels tells your loved one that she is the only one in the World.

Accessories are there to help not to substitute and as long as you know it and understand the importance of feelings and displaying them, you don’t feel pressured by the industry you choose to use it to help you show others that you care. Every occassion is good to do this, certain dates, traditions are there to help us remember about the things we loose sight of on everyday basis. Also make other people understand that this time is devoted for loved ones, not work, not cleaning, not 1000 other things, just love :)

Valentine’s Day is a symbolic date, time when women count on romance which is often missing from their relationship. I know from my experience of the disproportion of effort between men and women in putting effort in sustaining the “spark”. Being spoiled on this one date, is that really this much to ask?

To balance the last paragrapgh I would really like to say I know a guy who is different. And guess what. I do! I do and I treasure him for this :) (even though obviously there is no romance between us) I don’t think I ever met somebody who would care so much about the other person. You are a lucky girl E. I know you know that.

Excuse this personal note.

Anyway Happy Valentine’s Day! Hope you can make it special :)

Begin with the end in mind – Habit 2

At the beginning of the chapter the author asks us to do an exercise. To imagine we come to our own funeral three years from now and listen to people speak about us. The aim is to imagine what we want them to say to realize what is important to us. I tried to do it three or four times and have no idea what I want them to say. Most of what comes to my mind is such a cliche. Try it!

And now key points of beginning with the end in mind:

  • make the end of your life as your frame of reference
  • start with a clear understanding of your destination
  • lean the ladder against the right wall so every step doesn’t get you faster to the wrong place
  • all things are created twice, first creation is mental, second physical so imagine/visualize what you want to achieve before acting (yes a nit of NLP here)
  • we are either the second creation of our own proactive design, or we are the second creation of other people people’s agendas, of circumstances, or of past habits, so write your own mission statement and make decisions in accordance to it, think long – term, get perspective
  • the key to the ability to change is a changeless sense of who you are, what you are about and what you value

 It is incredibly easy to get caught up in an activity trap, in the busy-ness of life (…) People often find themselves achieving victories that are empty, successes that have come at the expense of things they suddenly realize were far more valuable to them.

Being afraid of achieving  goals in case we find out they were the wrong goals. We worked on it in life coaching training session. We also asked ourselves what we want to achieve and what is topping us from doing so. Let’s say it’s lack of self confidence. A hard one. Where does one get the confidence from? Achievements? Sure but from my own experience I know how easy it is to undermine the achievements and say “other achieved more” or “I could do better”. Where doe this inner conviction that I can be successful, loved and happy comes from?

Well try to think: “how will I know when I’m self confident?” the first answer that comes to my mind is “I will feel it” so “what will you feel exactly?” “Calm, joy, reconciliation, contentment…” “Brilliant, so what needs to happen for you to feel calm?” and so on…

According to Covey :

Whatever is at the center of our life will be the source of our security, guidance, wisdom and power.

Security represents your sense of worth, your identity, your emotional anchorage, your self-esteem, your basic personal strenght or lack of it.

Guidance means your source of direction in life. Encompassed by your map, your internal frame of reference that interprets for your what is happening out there, are standards or principles or implicit criteria that govern moment by moment decision-making and doing.

Wisdom is your perspective on life, your sense of balance, your understanding of how the various parts and principles apply and relate to each other. It embraces judgment, discernment, comprehension. It is a gestalt or oneness, an integrated wholeness.

Power is the faculty or capacity to act, the strength and potency to accomplish something. It is the vital energy to make choices and decisions. It also includes the capacity to overcome deeply embedded habits and to cultivate higher, more effective ones.

seven habits of highly effective peopleSo the deal is: you get to know your values and write them down as a mission statement. This is your center, the things that are important to you. Now you know what is important and you also know that every decision that you make brings you to achieving it and so you have more security, guidance, wisdom and power (higher self-esteem)

So does it work?

Stephen R. Covey on Personal Change – Habit I “Be proactive”

Probably many of you heard about Stephen’s book called “The seven habits of highly effective people”. I’m not sure what have you heard, if you liked what you heard or in fact already read the book. I just got to habit 3 and the book is nothing  I have expected. It’s way more than that.

I decided it’s so good I want to share my thoughts with you and I will start one by one exploring what the habits mean to me. Hope it’s interesting for you and maybe you can relate to it.  I recommend that you read the book because my posts won’t be an abbreviation of it, rather loose thoughts in the subject.

Before I start on habit one though, complynn left me this link in a comment  http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/blinded-by-your-own-micro-climate/ maybe you would like to have a look at it as well :)

Seven habits

HABIT I – BE PROACTIVE

We are not our feelings. We are not our moods. We are not even our thoughts. The very fact that we can think about these things separates us from them and from the animal world. (…)

There are actually three social maps – three theories of determinism widely accepted, independently or in combination, to explain the nature of man. Genetic determinism basically says your grandparents did it to you (…) it’s in your DNA. (…) Psychic determinism basically says your parents did it to you. Your upbringing, your childhood experience essentially laid out your personal tendencies and your character structure. (…) Environmental determinism basically says your boss is doing it to you – or your spouse, or that bratty teenager, or your economic situation, or national policies. Someone or something in your environment is responsible for your situation.

I remember one lesson my Dad gave me when I was little. We used to talk a lot, or rather I used to listen to him a lot. He said something like this: if you put the responsibility and blame of what happened to you on other people or circumstances, you will never be able to change your situation, because you cannot change what does not depend on you. My parents were like that all the time. When I was going to a party saying “Oh I know it will be boring” my Mum would say “You will only have as much fun as you make/allow yourself to have”. When I was young, I wasn’t convinced, but now I know it’s true.

I guess the biggest problem I had with this approach is that, if it’s all down to me, there is only one person I can blame if it doesn’t work out, that is myself. And who likes to think badly about themselves? This is when I had to learn to forgive myself constructively (draw conclusions and do not make the same mistake twice). When I look back at my life I can’t see things that I really wanted and didn’t achieve. Not very modest, but I honestly think that when I really wanted something I did achieve it. It doesn’t mean that I’m happy with my life now, as most of the time I have a problem with deciding what I want. I tried a lot of things and got bored with them quite quickly. Now my concern is it will happen again and again, and as the things take more time to achieve I will be wasting my time.  On a two day seminar in personal coaching we called it the fear of achieving your goal.

Can we control our feelings? I guess not. We can control how we react to what we feel. We can’t control other people to behave so that they don’t make us feel certain way, we can choose how we interpret their behavior and what we are going to do about it. We can also look for the intentions and not always believe what we hear literally. There are so many examples that pop into my head from my life and lives of my friends, but it calls for discretion as feelings are such a touchy subject.

Some people believe in destiny, other that we create our own destiny. What is the truth? (I’m Sagittarius, so I have tendency to look for truth – see, there we go again, determinism) The truth as I see it, is: we can let others and conditions rule our life – this is when destiny has it’s rule, or we can choose how we respond to conditions, how we act upon them, transform them to achieve what we want – this is when we create our own destiny.

He could decide within himself how all of this was going to affect him. (…) They had more liberty, more options to choose from in their environment; but he had more freedom, more internal power to exercise his options. (…) fundamental principle about the nature of man: Between stimulus and response, man has the freedom to choose.

Within the freedom to choose are those endowments that make us uniquely human. In addition to self-awareness, we have  imagination – the ability to create in our minds beyond our present reality. We have conscience – a deep inner awareness of right and wrong, of the principles that govern our behavior, and sense of a degree to which our thoughts and actions are in harmony with them. And we have independent will – the ability to act based on our self-awareness, free of all influences.

Liberty versus Freedom. I used to be very independent, or self-dependent. For a long time in all relationships I was chasing external proofs of freedom that possibly I didn’t have inside.  I remember the fear of loosing myself in another person, in relationship. So I wanted to make my own decisions and let it be seen, do everything myself,  leave the party when I wanted to leave and so on. It is still very important for me but it’s not an exaggeration anymore. Though I still reserve the right to go somewhere without saying where I’m going, which some people do not understand. Funny, it does not happen often but when it does the most unexpected people give me hard time about it. I’m learning the freedom of response. I’m learning how and when to give up things I want now to invest in things that are important to me long term.

I have this thought in my head for a while now that whatever I do and wherever I am I can be happy if I decide to be, that I can make my life “work” anywhere, so why am I not happy now? Why do I feel the urge to leave? I suppose I just need a change because I’m bored.

Independent will – free of all influences. How free of influences can one be? Even if you decide not to follow the path somebody/somethings presses upon you, you still are conditioned by the decision you make. You may feel excluded by the choices you’ve made. What then? I remember reading a book in which a girl said “They drew a circle and I was outside of it. I knew I just had to draw a circle that would contain us all” (not really sure what book it was). Freedom does not mean loneliness, just necessity to look for things in common that might not be apparent.

Now down to the definition of PROACTIVITY

It means more than merely taking initiative. It means that as human beings, we are responsible for our own lives. Our behavior is function of our decisions, not our conditions. We can subordinate feelings to values. We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.

Look at the word responsibility – “response-ability” – the ability to choose our own response. Highly  proactive people recognize that responsibility. They do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is product of their own choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.

Reactive people are often affected by their physical environment. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn’t, it affects their attitude and their performance. Proactive people can carry their own weather with them. (…) reactive people are also affected by their social environment, by the “social weather”. When people treat them well, they feel well; when people don’t, they become defensive or protective. Reactive people build their emotional lives around the behavior of others, empowering the weaknesses of  other people to control them. (…)

Proactive people are still influenced by external stimuli, whether physical, social or psychological. But their response to the stimuli, conscious or unconscious,  is a value-based choice or response. As Eleanor Roosevelt observed, “No one can hurt you  without your consent.” (…) It is our willing permission, our consent to what happens to us, that hurts us far more than what happens to us in the first place. I admit this is very hard to accept emotionally, especially if we had years and years of explaining our misery in the name of circumstance or someone else’s behavior. But until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday”, that person cannot say, “I choose otherwise.”

Erich Fromm on personality – stage of my self development

Today we come across an individual who behaves like an automaton, who does not know or understand himself, and the only person that he knows is the person he is supposed to be, whose meaningless chatter has replaced communicative speech, whose synthetic smile has replace genuine laughter, and whose sense of dull despair has taken the place of genuine pain. Two statements may be said concerning this individual. One is that he suffers from defects of spontaneity and individuality which may seem to be incurable. At the same time it may be said of him he does not differ essentially from the millions of the rest of us who walk upon this earth.

As far as I can remember I knew what way I was supposed to be, at some pointEgg I also knew what kind of person I wanted to be. So I put many efforts into changing my personality and I think  I did succeed, not in everything, at least not in everything at once and not permanently. It feels a bit fake. All the positive thinking, communication techniques, working on controlling emotions and many many more, feels really dull now and tiring. What happened to personal freedom and being yourself? All this work done did not increase my self esteem (as it was expected to) even though I really did achieve the goals on self improvement path I set in the first place.

Now: Let’s go back to the basic and find out who I really am and what to do next, I’ll keep you posted :)

I will only tell you I tried recently mind programming with Paul McKenna, 2 day free course at The Coaching Academy and watched Anthony Robbins. All highly enjoyable and agitating but it did not work.

What do you think? Are you currently in the middle of implementing life changes? Let me know how you get on and if you have any suggestions what I can do :)